Ask questions, or leave comments…

The Coffee Date

October 8th, 2009 by M.S.

So she’s agreed to meet you for coffee. This is a clear sign that she is interested in getting to know you. From here on in if you can manage to get this short coffee date right she’ll have no objections of going on a second date with you.

An important factor of this date is to keep it short and limited to a period of 20 to 40 minutes. There are several reasons behind this. Firstly, you do not know enough about this woman to socialize with her for any longer than half an hour. Secondly, you’re following a carefully created plan to ensure that you succeed with this woman.

Keeping this first dateUnderground Seduction

The latest high quality seduction package at an unbeatable price...Learn the secrets...$15 discount..
short ensures you have the highest chance of meeting this woman again for a second date. This coffee dateUltimate First Date Guide

Learn the exact social dynamic techniques that ensure seduction. Guaranteed to help you succeed on a first date. Know exactly what to do and say!!.
is only for you to find out about this woman’s likes and dislikes and to strengthen your connection with her.

This date is not intended so you can just hang out with her and chat about stuff and maybe see what happens. Experts with women do not approach any dates with women without structure and purpose.

It’s needless to say and totally expected of you to be impeccably dressed to suit the situation. Although most coffee dates are casual attire, it’s crucial that your version of casual is dangerously smooth. It’s a simple detail to dress right…and it’s absolutely necessary. Women care about the way you dress. If your dress sense boarders on perfection, she’ll be impressed before you even open your mouth.

This only makes things easier for you. Remember, when you are not speaking, your cloths are speaking for you. What do you want yours to say about you?

Make sure you’re on time. If you’re slightly late on purpose, then you’re playing games with her. What’s the point of being late on purpose? To give yourself a false senses of importance or try to impress upon her that you don’t really care about being on time. Either way it won’t work for you and you’ll usually lose ground with women if you’re not on time.

But don’t be too early either. She might interpret this as you being too desperate and not having a life. Just try to get there on time. If you’re a touch early, find something to occupy yourself with so you’re not sitting there twiddling your thumbs when she gets there. Read a magazine or call a friend and let him know that you might have to hang up as soon as she gets there so you can pass the time and it doesn’t look like you’re just sitting there and waiting for her.

It’s always best if you make a backup plan for yourself so you have something to do or somewhere to go should she not turn up. When you’re dating lots of women, there will be times when they will not show up. When you’re backup plan is in place it helps you to alleviate any resentment you may hold towards her, as you already have something planned should she not show up. After all, you are dressed perfectly and you look great, so you might as well take advantage of it.

If she doesn’t show up and your attitude is detached from taking things personally as an expert’s is, you shouldn’t really have a problem. Simply call her up the following day and ask her out again. Just try something like, “hey you didn’t make it yesterday…I had something to do so I didn’t hang around that long so don’t feel bad about it. I’d still like to share a coffee with you though…would you like to try again tomorrow evening around seven?”

If she doesn’t show up again, then it’s time to let her be. Only see her again if she calls you and apologizes for breaking the arrangement.

You need to strengthen your connection with her on this coffee date so she is compelled to see you again. We’re going to run through a connection strengthening checklist to ensure you don’t miss easy opportunities to achieve this outcome.It helps if we start at the very top of her head and work down so you can easily remember all the little tricks that help to build connection. Let’s start with everything to do with her eyes. During the half hour you spend with her you must ensure that you gaze into her eyes for more than three seconds on two occasions.

Upon breaking this gaze ensure that you do not look down, rather just move your eyes to something that is beside her at the same height as her eyes and then look back in to her eyes again briefly. Looking down to break an eye gaze denotes shame, fear and embarrassment. Don’t do it.

As you’re looking into her eyes think about how much she already loves you to help you sustain the correct kind of eye contact. You won’t have a problem maintaining eye contact with her if you focus your thoughts on how much she loves you and is dying to kiss you.

At some stage through the date you also need to look at her body deliberately whist she is watching your eyes. Women need to know that you find them attractive. The problem occurs when guys do this the wrong way. Your allowed to look, you’ve just got to do it right. In fact if you don’t look, she’ll start to get worried.

Occasionally when natural eye contact occurs between you, allow your gaze to drift down her neckline and onto her shoulders or upper arms. This gaze should not exceed two seconds in length. After you have gazed at her body, ensure you look straight back into her eyes again briefly. This shows her that you’re not fearful or ashamed to look at her. This says to her, “I’ve noticed that you have quiet an attractive body and it’s a pleasure to look at. I’m not ashamed to look at your body as I know you don’t mind me admiring you the right way”

This doesn’t give you permission to stare at her breasts but if you accidentally find yourself doing this just return your gaze to her eyes whilst thinking about how much effort she has put in to look good for you.

Most guys look at a woman’s body and then look away from her avoiding eye contact. This says to her, “I just looked at your body and I’m ashamed of myself and I don’t have the courage to look you in the eye again after doing it.

Just think about how she’s been working out to get herself in shape just for you. This will give you the correct mindset to look at her body appropriately. And then of course you’ll return your gaze into her eyes before looking away from her.

There’s also a little trick you can do if you catch her staring at you. Just give her a smile and wink at her. This builds connection. If you’re in a cheeky mood you can even add a comment like, “…I don’t mind if you stare at me…I’ve done it to you…”, or something like that.

Now we come down to her nose which is our reminder to ask about and comment on her perfume. She has probably worn her favorite one. This is a date for her too, even if it is just coffee. To increase your connection with her you might want to simply ask her something like, “are you wearing perfume….?…(yes)…I thought so…it smells great…(thank you)”

If you’re really on fire you might gesture to her to lean towards you so you can smell it properly. After you smell it again while she is close to you can say something like, “hmmm, very… (Nice, alluring, appealing, tempting, enticing), depending on what mood you’re in.

Then just ask her if that’s her favorite perfume. It doesn’t really matter what says in response to this question, it just sets up the tone for you to talk to her seductively about perfume.

If she says ‘yes’, you can even playfully accuse her of trying to seduce you by wearing her most enticing and alluring perfume to the first coffee date. Then you might playfully hint that it might be working whilst giving her a slow wink.

If she says ‘no’, you can playfully accuse her of saving her favorite one for the next date she goes on with you so she can really work her magic on you then…just as you were beginning to think that she was a nice girl…

After any playful cocky and funny banter with her or any push and pull flirtation, change gears and show her your serious side. This can be a powerful seduction technique. It doesn’t allow her to put you in a category and keeps her intrigued. Don’t spend the whole coffee date trying to be funny or trying to be seriously seductive, make sure you mix it up.

After playing around with her perfume answers change gears. Using the most seductive word combination you can think of you can simply talk about the arousing aromas of some perfumes and how what turns some people on, might also turn some people off.

Then use that as a cue to ask her something like, “so what exactly is it about a particular kind of man that you find yourself attracted to?”

Then take in all the clues she gives you about what she finds attractive in guys as you can use them later with her. Some women get shy when you ask them questions like this and they’ll respond with “Umm…I don’t know, I’ve never really thought about it. What is it with certain women that cause you to be attracted to them?”

This is another perfect cue for you to start describing all the sensual qualities of your perfect woman to her whilst ensuring that she possesses most of the qualities you’re talking about. After she takes in what you’ve said, change gears again.

Playfully accuse her of knowing all your secrets now and her plotting to use them for her own benefit so she can have her way with you. Then get serious again and say, “I’m not saying that it would be a bad thing” The opportunities are endless and they all grew out of asking her about her perfume.

The next things after her nose are her ears. Throughout this coffee date you must try to whisper in her ear at least once. This is helping her get used to the idea of your face being close to her face as whispering is an intimate thing to do.

One way to do this is to locate another guy in the area who you can both see and look over in his direction with a very slight bemused look on your face. Then gesture to for her to lean over to you like you want to whisper something to her.

Get as close to her ear as you can and whisper, “Looks like there’s another person here who also thinks you look beautiful this evening” With this technique you are basically whispering into her ear that she looks beautiful. This is powerful stuff when it is done right. It is not a direct compliment and makes her think.

Another way to do this is to be in mid conversation with her and say to her, “I’ve actually got a secret that I’ve been dying to tell someone, would you like to her it…?…”(yes)

You need her to bring her ear close, so just say, “It’s a secret…so come closer, because I’m only going to whisper it” Then simply whisper into her ear a compliment regarding her most beautiful feature. Maybe something like’ “…Your hair looks absolutely gorgeous today…” And then lean back as if nothing happened and say to her, “But don’t tell anybody I told you that…it’s a secret remember…”

If you haven’t got the courage to do one of the above to her than your only other option is to whisper something into her ear about someone or something else.

But make sure you’re not complaining about something or making fun of the gay waiter. Her brother might be gay. Just make an observation about something and find a reason to whisper about it.

Now we’ve passed her ears and it’s onto her mouth. It’s to remind you that at the end of the coffee date you should know what her favorite foods are and what things she likes to do fun. But do not barrage her with questions and turn this into an interview.

Your conversation should consist of (30%) playful humorous light hearted flirting, (30%) seductive descriptions and romantic topics, (30%) neutral small talk whilst finding about her likes and dislikes…and (10%) silence.

If you can get this ratio right, it will be easy for her to feel enough of a connection with you to go on a second date with you. You can find a full breakdown of all the methods used via the links to the specific posts in the above paragraph. It’s just too much information to fit into one post.

For now, let’s look at one example which contains all three aspects of the recommended conversation ratios.

For example you might ask her, “So obviously you work out…and that’s an observation…not a compliment…….you can take that as a compliment if you want…but seriously, what’s your favorite way to work out…?”

In the above example there is small talk entwined with playful flirtatious backhanded compliments while you are asking her a genuine question.

You can then use her answers to move into your seductive descriptions about the subject at hand as she will often reciprocate a question back to you on the same subject.

It doesn’t matter what she replies with because you can just steer the conversation into your seductive description. In the worst case scenario, she might reply with, “I don’t work out at all…” and then simply not say anything after that.

You could just reply to that with, “Oh so it’s all genetics hey,…only very few are that lucky…I wish I had it that easy…but sometimes working out can be fun…especially if you do it somewhere different…” She then might say something like ‘what do you mean’ or ‘yeah that’s true’

Then you just lead into your seductive and romantic descriptions with something like, “My favorite has got to be running on a secluded beach…You don’t get to do it often, but it’s always special when you do…It’s great to run just on the water’s edge because the sand is wet and it makes it harder…so it’s much easier to run on. It’s too hard to run on the soft sand so I always run right next the water…And there’s nothing like the smell of the beach…Have you ever been to a tropical island for a holiday…?”

Now whilst you’re describing your exercise routine on the beach with a very subtle seductive tone and emphasis on the words in italic, it allows her to get swept up in the description and experience the feelings you’re describing.

This is extremely powerful stuff and when it is done right it will create a connection that is strong enough for her to want to see you again.

The words like ‘special, wet, harder, easier and nothing like it’ go straight through to her subconscious because the sentence itself is slightly confusing, although it does make perfect sense. You’re also bringing her back from her experience by simply asking her if she has ever been to a tropical island.

Upon receiving her answer from that question you could simply lead into some talk about how romantic tropical islands are. Your options are endless but be careful you maintain the correct ratio regarding the differing aspects of your conversation. Don’t overdo it. You’d only want to take her through two seductive descriptions like the example above in the half hour you are with her.

(Continued…Part 2)

Category: The Coffee Date | 6 Comments »


Recent Entries

6 Responses

  1. James Says:

    Just the advise I was looking for. Thanks for posting..

  2. TSwain Says:

    There’s good info here. I did a search on the topic and found most people will agree with your blog. Keep up the good work mate!

  3. What Are Her Eyes Saying | Articles Active Says:

    [...] eyes. You also now know what you are actually saying to women with your eyes. Check out the Coffee Date for tonnes of free seduction info. Read First Date Secrets for the ultimate guide to seduction on [...]

  4. Noah from attract women help Says:

    Thanks so much for your post, I liked every part of it especially the part on dealing with how a guy should be neat and well dressed. I can’t believe the number of guys meeting women with sport shoes these days :) It makes me laugh every time.

  5. Ivey Nakhle Says:

    Many thanks for the marvelous blog posting! I found your post very interesting, I believe you are a excellent writer. I added your blog to my bookmarks and will return in the future to your blog. Keep up that exciting job, have a great daytime!

  6. Olimpia Halling Says:

    Love your site man keep up the good work

Leave a Comment

XHTML: You can use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Please note: Comment moderation is enabled and may delay your comment. There is no need to resubmit your comment.